Regret
by Vincent's Dark Mistress
Summary: “You knew? Why didn’t you tell me? All of this time I thought he was after me, and he just wanted to be freed! I could have saved him, Vincent, I could have prevented another death!” -- Very slight Cloud/Kadaj


"You know, brother, I never wanted this." Kadaj whispers almost nostalgically, stealing a wary glance over towards the older blonde who was eyeing him rather suspiciously. He smiled sadly, raising his hand up in front of his face to study it. Cloud watched the action from afar carefully, his sword ready for an attack at any moment.

"Mother doesn't love me…she never did, you know? She doesn't want me. However, its like I'm almost programmed to be loyal to her. I don't want any of this. I don't want Sephiroth, I don't want anyone to die."

Cloud stared at Kadaj, incredulous. He was checking the boy for any physical signs of lying, a helpful tactic he had learned from Zack a while ago, and was almost surprised to find no evidence. He cautiously lowered his sword and narrowed his eyes at the younger boy.

"Then don't. Don't hurt any more people." Cloud stated simply, placing his sword back into its holster. He almost felt bad for the boy…almost.

"I wish it were that simple, brother. Mother wants to control me, she wants Sephiroth back so badly. It's like I have no control over what I do anymore. You can help me, help keep Sephiroth away from me."

"You can prevent it, Kadaj, not me. Don't listen to Jenova, don't do what she wants and you can escape from her."

Kadaj choked on a sob as he walked closer to Cloud, who quickly placed his hand on the handle of his sword just in case, and fell to the ground, with "Mother" falling from his arms, empty.

"It's too late brother, she already has what she wants from me. Just promise me this, promise me that you'll destroy Sephiroth and save this world."

Cloud gasped in shock, pulling his sword out of its holster and scowling as Kadaj's body began to transform. The young boy yelled out in pain, his body shaking with sobs and screams. It was painful for Cloud to watch, but he had to pay attention. Sephiroth would be here any minute, and he could not waste time.

"Promise me, brother!"

"I promise, Kadaj."

The younger boy smiled, tears still leaking from his eyes as his body weakened. He stumbled, losing his footing from the edge of the building and falling into the air. Cloud followed suit, his sword already in position to attack, and once they both landed, Kadaj was now Sephiroth, soft eyes turned cold.

"Good to see you, Cloud."

* * *

Cloud watched as Sephiroth faded away, and a calm feeling of pure relief washed over him. Sephiroth was gone, again. It was over…it was all over.

However, when Kadaj's body materialized from Sephiroth's wreckage, guilt washed over any relief Cloud had previously felt. He ran forward, catching the boy before he hit the ground, and all Kadaj could do was smile.

"It's time for me to go back now, brother. Thank you, for keeping your promise."

Cloud frowned, feeling Kadaj's neck for his pulse. He felt strong, but irregular throbs and sighed lightly. He had to hurry.

"Let me bring you on my friend's ship, we can help you heal."

Kadaj chuckled lightly, moving his neck away from Cloud's fingers and closing his eyes.

"This is all I was put here for. To be Sephiroth, to fight you and try to kill this planet, and then die when defeated. It was a fate I knew of the second I'd been created. It's my time now, brother."

"No Kadaj, we can help you. Just…just hang on, okay?"

Without letting Kadaj respond, Cloud rose to his feet with the smaller boy in his arms and nodded towards Cid's direction, who took the hint and landed Shera right next to the two. Cloud could feel Kadaj getting heavier as the boy weakened and gave up, and began to run, hopping onto the ship before the stairs had even finished unfolding.

"I need some help in here, we have to save him!" Cloud yelled, ignoring everyone's looks of confusion as he reached for Yuffie's stash of potions and materia. "Don't just stand there, help me keep him alive!"

"Cloud…" Vincent tried, placing his metal claw on the blonde's shoulder and ceasing his actions. "Cloud, he's already gone."

"NO! He's NOT gone yet! I won't let another person die in this battle!" Cloud yelled in response, pushing Vincent away and kneeling down next to Kadaj, forcing three or four potions down his throat and casting cure on all of his wounds. After a few seconds, Kadaj's eyes fluttered open and Cloud let out a sigh of relief.

"I told you to hang on, Kadaj!"

"Br-brother…don't waste the potions. I'm still going to die, regardless. I just…I wanted to say thank you, and I'm sorry."

"Its okay Kadaj, it really is. I just need you to have more willpower and hang on to life."

"My fate has been decided. I'll be better off this way anyway. I love you, big brother." Kadaj choked out, grabbing on to Cloud's arm softly. The blonde man cursed, holding Kadaj close to his chest while muttering a light "I'm sorry." and winced when he felt the small boy go limp in his arms.

"Damnit…"

Vincent, who had been watching the scene almost sadly, pulled Cloud to his feet and nodded at him. "He was fated to end like this. I know that he wanted nothing to do with any of this, but nothing anyone could have done would have stopped it."

"You knew? Why didn't you tell me? All of this time I thought he was after me, and he just wanted to be freed! I could have saved him, Vincent, I could have prevented another death!"

Vincent sighed lightly, closing his eyes and frowning. "It wasn't my place to say. Now come on, we need to get you home."

Cloud nodded sadly, looking down at Kadaj's body. Regret hit him full force, but he choked the emotion down for the sake of his friends and walked back towards them.

"Okay, let's go."


End file.
